And to remember I’m not able to go back is killing me. I should have done so many things differently. I should have had a better idea about what I was doing while I was there. I should have applied for scholarships. I should have done better in high school. I should have spent all those nights studying instead of putting it off. It wouldn’t have been that hard. I should have used my resources. I should have asked for help. I should have talked to my professors when I was struggling and I should have put my studies before everything else.
I would give so much to go back there. I just can’t afford it. That simple. I spent too many nights fucking around and telling myself “I’ll do it later”. Yeah, being social is important, but I blew it. I lost an entire semester, landing with no credits for all of my work and a small fortune lost.
If you’re there right now and it’s hard, just know you’re not the only one. You absolutely can do it. Don’t give up yet!